[[*---Don't Catch Me As I Fall---*]]

Friday, March 04, 2005

A bird recovering from a broken wing is taking its flight once again. In the process of attempting to fly, it met with obstactles that brought it back to its injured state. Although its discouraging to fall again, the bird makes another attempt to fly agin. Each time it tries, it gets better. There will be a day that the bird with a broken wing will soar in the sky again.

My heart that is once shattered into pieces is slowly piecing back into a whole. But I let that fragile heart be shattered again. I'm having a relapse. Although each relapse is painful, it gets better each time.

I begin to feel that I don't understand myself anymore. Sometimes giving myself hope is as good as disappointing myself. Feelings that fade could never be rekindle.

No two parties could love each other equally at the same time. One would always love the other party more. The time when my love was the deepest was the time when feelings the other party had for me fades to nothing. A simple sentence "I don't have feelings for you anymore" meant so much , yet so little. God/Buddha is playing a joke on me.

I used to be the one consoling my friends telling them to let go. Its only when I am into the sitation, I know how it feels. When I was with him, I feel like I'm in a fairy tale. True enough, fairy tales don't exist. Chindrealla don't necessary leave happily ever after. Maybe she got a divorce in the end.

My heart is dead. I had enough. The one that steps out of the relationship 1st would never feel hurt because he/she is still being loved. The one that clings on would be the one suffering.

Friends of the party that walk out of the relationship 1st would always look down on the one that is clinging on. They would always side their friends. Even if they see the party putting down their pride to ask for another chance, they take it as a joke. A free show.

I truely feels for those that put down their pride for the one they love. Its not easy to do so. Its even more difficult if its a gal. I never been so prideless before. If you ask me if I regret doing so, I don't. At least, I am true to my feelings, true to myself.

The sentence "We are still friends." is fake. Action speaks louder than words. Its pretty interesting. When you are interested in a person, no matter what he/she says. You feel interesting as well. But when feeling fades, no matter how interested you once were, you feel irritated.

Why are humans so cruel?

Are all humans like that?

Humans are the most complicated creatures in the world.

Lastly, I wish for eternal happiness for you. Remember that I'll always pray that you would be happy in whatever you do and where ever you are.

Lynnie black out at 2:48 AM