[[*---Don't Catch Me As I Fall---*]]

Sunday, January 23, 2005

I'm a stupid gal

I'm blogging in the morning again.
I seem to blog more often nowadays.
I juz need some space to pen my tots.

Can't always trouble my frens with my negative tots.
They would get sick of me one day.
Coz I'm getting sick of myself already.

Shopping is becoming something tedious to me.
I dun seem to fit nice into anything now.
Last time I tot its nice to be slim so I could get clothes easily.
I was wrong.
I dun even look nice in small size clothes.
I'm super boney now.
I used to wear S, now I could fit into XS.
S is too big for me!

After walking for a few hours.
I only manage to get at topshop skirt.
It costs $73.
I know its expensive.
Last time, I dun even think of spending 50 bucks for a skirt.
But I look nice in tat, at least it dun make me look so thin.
Sheila said I looked like a stick figure now.
I weigh 44kg and I stand at 1.63m.
Its scarey.
I dun look as nice as last time.
I mean nt tat I'm those really good lookin kind.
At least I look more proportionate.
The more I look at myself, the more I wana gain weight.
Though I seriously wana gain weight.
I can't eat much at 1 time.
Some food juz turns me off.
I'm gonna stuff myself wif fattening food everyday.
But its juz so happen tat tats turns me off.
Contridicting..

My dad is back!!
Woke up freakin early at 5 plus to fetch him.
Had BK breakfast and now I can't get back to sleep.
Oh yeah.. He brought back a samsung E800C!!
Dream phone...!!!
I gonna take ownership of tat phone!!
But gonna get it repaired 1st.
Coz my dad plug the wrong way while charging it and it dun work now!! =(
Hope its the batt tat is spoilt and not the phone!!

I'm really stupid.
All the things I did for the past few weeks.
What did I get?
Only to make myself look so deperate and depress.
Pple behind me will be saying: Y get so hard up over a guy blah blah..
Stupid.
Lynnie is a stupid gal.
I seriously gonna stop I'm doing.
Sometimes, I'm in the state of unstable emotions.
Can't think logically.
Stupid again.
Now I absolutely think that true love dun exists.
Its juz pple feel lonely sometimes and need a champanion?
Or is that they truely love the person?
I guess I'm not mature enough to handle the thing call LOVE.
I admit tat on the surface I seem to give up on already.
But my heart still lingers.
Breaking up does not equal to getting him outta of mine mind.
But I seriously gotta do so.
One day, if we meet.
I would still smile and say hi.
I shall promise to stop every single thing to salvage it.
Coz I clearly know, I no longer have a place in his heart.
Sometimes what he says is juz being polite.
Hahaha..
I knew it..

Now is truely the start of something new...! =)

Lynnie black out at 3:03 AM